Best of Movies 2011

Jables: Might as well follow the crowd and create a best of 2011 list.  Unfortunately due to a lot of reasons I haven't seen near as many movies as I would have liked but I still got to see plenty of great flicks.  Also some terrible ones.  Here we go.

Must sees:


The Adventures of Tintin - Amazingly clean fun.  What an adventure movie should be like.
X-Men First Class - A brilliant James Bondish X-Men flick.
13 Assassins - Ninjas galore.  What a great ride.
Tucker and Dale vs Evil - A great spin on the tired horror movie genre.
Drive - Perfectly paced flick with a great 80's inspired soundtrack.

New Release Movies: Cowboys & Aliens (2011)

Quantom: Every now and then a film will come along and tell you exactly what it is from the title alone. Films such as "Batman Begins" and "Snakes on a Plane," among many others. Batman Begins obviously tells us it's about the origins of Batman, but it builds up a rich story throughout the course of the film, which is still continuing two films later. Snakes on a Plane on the other hand, is 90 minutes worth of Samuel L. Jackson and snakes on a plane. So here then, we have "Cowboys & Aliens." The question is, which is it? A film that uses its title as the basis for an intriguing story, or two hours of cowboys and aliens?

New Release Movies: Green Lantern (2011)

Jables: Just looking at the movie poster you can almost tell what this movie is going to be like.  Ok let us have a quick look at the premise of the film.  Basically you have this super awesome corp of superhero aliens (round about 3,600 of them) and they use the power of "will" (which apparently is the colour green, go figure) and use this to fight all types of evil.  Anyway, this big bad guy named Parallax has turned up again after a very long time to do bad stuff.  So Tom Strong (pinky red guy on the poster) goes to the Jedi council and asks for help and stuff.  He takes a bunch of these super awesome superhero guys in green to the big bad and get their arses handed to them.

First Reactions: The Avengers Teaser Trailer

Jables: So even before watching this trailer I must state the following.  I love movies and there have been some really cool and fun comic book movies but OMG another comic book movie?  Really?  Ok I’ll play along. 

Lets go through the players involved.  

Hulk.  Ang Lee’s version didn’t really hit the mark even though Bana was great and the opening scenes were pretty groovy.  Then there was the forgettable Norton reboot that wasn’t good and wasn’t shit.  It really was just nothing that you could be forgiven to not even know ever exisited.  

Thor.  The flick was alright.  Aussie boy Hemsworth was really good and the flick was fun in parts.  Yeah they tried to ruin it with the pointless Portman love story but hey it’s Hollywood. 

Iron Man.  Fuck yeah.  The first movie was amazing.  Brilliantly acted and amazingly directed.  A really fun flick.  But then there was the sequel.  This was basically a teaser for the Avengers movie.  With Scarlett and Samuel L just ruining Iron Man’s groove.  

Captain America.  I haven’t seen this flick yet but by all accounts it wasn’t as fun as Thor and a bit disappointing.  

And then Hawkeye.  A guy that can shoot a bow and arrow really well.  Cool.

Game of Boards: Battlestar Galactica

Overview:

Whether you're a fan of the TV show that this is based off or not, you will love this game.  The premise of the game is that you are a military ship named Galactica and you are protecting civilian transport ships as you make hyperspace jumps to get to your destination planet of Kobol.  However, along the way your enemies the Cylons are trying to make you fail.  There might be traitors in your crew or wave upon wave of Cylon fighters trying to kill your population, break your morale or destroy your food or fuel supplies.  When one of these things hits 0 it is all over.

Q: I had never seen the original TV show nor the updated version, and I have to say Josh is spot on the money. I didn't know my Kobols from Cylons, or the assortment of characters from Gaius Baltar to Admiral Adama. Regardless of my knowledge of the universe, the BSG board game was a great way to be introduced to the series, which I will be watching sometime in the near future. This game will make you laugh. It will make you accuse your friends of being "a dirty Cylon." All for the sole goal of "doing a massive Hazza."

New Release Movies: Source Code (2011)

Cheesy Poster

Source Code is the latest film from director Duncan Jones, better known to some as Zowie Bowie. It follows up from his great first effort Moon, which was a low-budget but brutal story about Sam Rockwell on...well on the moon. He has made use of an increased budget to cast a couple of good names, Jake Gyllenhaal being the biggest. He is supported by Michelle Monaghan and Vera Farmiga in the title roles. The film, like Moon, is another semi science-fiction job, having many futuristic ideas but staying well in the modern world or near future.

Garbage Dump: The Golden(Eye) Goose

Goldeneye. A decent enough new age James Bond flick that launched Remington Steele into Hollywood and spawned one of the greatest console games and first person shooters of all time. So really it's no wonder people are still trying to milk the shit out of it.

Since the movie and Nintendo 64 game in 95 and 97 respectively, we have had a shitty game called GoldenEye: Rogue Agent that had nothing to do with the movie but was purely trying to cash in on the success of the N64 game. It failed.

Game of Boards: Last Night on Earth: The Zombie Game

Overview:

Zombie galore to be had here and who doesn't love zombies? Well this game is the ultimate B-Grade zombie movie themed board game littered with zombie movie tropes throughout. The main story behind the game is that you are in the town of Woodinvale and the place has just gone to hell. Depending on the scenario you are playing the story will change but the main idea is that you have a set amount of hours left in the day/night to complete your objectives and stay alive before the zombies take over. Enter lots of zombie killing shenanigans.

Garbage Dump: Star Wars Redos

Geek rant in progressing:

So apparently Lucas is going to touch up some more things he didn't like about the Star Wars movies when he releases the movies on Blu-Ray soon.

First announced change is that he is replacing the terible Yoda puppet in Phantom Menace with a CGI Yoda similar to the one used in Attack of the Clones.  Great idea but it really does seem that Lucas will just use CGI to change the movies whenever he feels like it and by the time my children have children the movies won't even be the same.

Q: You're right the puppet is shit, but if it was actual good puppetry I'd take puppets any day of the week. Especially knowing how shit the CGI in the "original" trilogy is now. 

Garbage Dump: Terrible Movies of the Future

Following on from what we talked about in Shittywood.  Yet another terrible movie sequel is on the way.


I didn't think it would be possible for someone to think it would be a good idea to make a sequel to Ghost Rider but apparently someone had the bright idea a few months back and now we have a trailer for Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengence.  Terrible title and terrible trailer.  The effects look even worse than the original.

New Release Movies: Limitless (2011)

Limitless is one of those movies that emerges from some dank, unknown place in Hollywood, congealing to form a shitty movie no-one really knows or cares about. I seem to recall it at the cinema not too long ago, and lo and behold a short time later it's now on DVD. All I knew about it from seeing a trailer (on TV? I don't know, somewhere) is that Bradley Cooper is taking some drugs that open his mind, and he is on Wall Street and Robert de Niro seems to be the bad guy. Well the trailer was misleading.

Garbage Dump: Shittywood

Quantom: By Shittywood, we are of course talking about Hollywood. That is, Hollywood has become shitty. There are so few movies that I am even interested in coming out. In fact I haven't been to the movies in months. I'm sitting here seeing all these trailers on the TV and what I see is: comic book movies, remakes and sequels. Green Lantern looks like the biggest pile of shit I have ever seen. I got offered a free ticket and thought "fuck this shit, it is literally not worth my time." The graphics honestly look like some nerd did it in 3D studio max or whatever it's called. The Hangover 2 was pretty much The Hangover set in Thailand. Like the exact same fucking plot. Total Recall is being remade, and you can be DAMN sure it won't feature three boob chick!

Newish Movies: The Dark Knight (2008)

Jables: Wow.  What can be said about this movie.  The first movie in the "reboot" Batman franchise was an outstanding success in the geek community and normal movie goers community alike.  It was a slightly more down to earth and realistic comic book movie than everyone was accustomed to.  Then the sequel was announced.  There was an uproar when Heath Ledger was announced as the Joker.  American geeks were shocked as to why this nobody from Australia, from that crappy teen movie Ten Things I Hate About You, was going to play one of the greatest comic book villains ever.  But Heath stuck it to them in the end.

Quantom: I actually didn't really love Batman Begins. I thought the pace was pretty off and it plodded along in parts. It was worth all the setup and character building though, because it meant we got this great flick.

New Release Movies: Your Highness (2011)

A complete turd.  The end.

No really it is a complete turd.  The fantasy parody genre has been done to death and the majority of the time it's shit.  There are really only 2 good fantasy comedies that are out there.  The Princess Bride and Monty Python and the Holy Grail.  Both are amazing movies and Your Highness is basically pissing all over them.

New Release Movies: Hanna (2011)

Bana and Blanchett.  Must be good right?  Not entirely.  With so much build up to one final showdown, the ending is rather lackluster.  But I'm getting ahead of myself here.

Hanna is basically a revenge flick where Bana has trained up his 2 year old daughter for 14 years to become an elite assassin babe.  They are living out in the forests in Finland away from everyone and every thing.  Hanna hasn't heard music, hasn't seen television, hasn't had any modern technology basically (besides guns) but she is at the peak of her physical form (maybe even above her peak) thanks to Bana training her like a soldier each and every day.  Why is he training her?  Basically to kill Blanchett.  Why?  No real reason, just cause.

What's on the Box: Game of Thrones - Season One (2011)

Warning: this review is super spoilerific. DO NOT read this if you haven't seen the show yet, as you really don't want it to be spoiled. Again, don't click the jump if you haven't seen the show! Consider yourself warned.

What is it?

 

HBO series based off the epic series of fantasy novels by George R. R. Martin titled A Song of Ice and Fire.  The television series takes it title from the first book, A Game of Thrones. There is already a second season in the works. 

New Release Movies: Bridesmaids (2011)

As you can tell from the title of the movie, it is a movie for chicks.  It's a chick flick.  Unfortunately the only bad thing about being married or having a girlfriend is that you have to sit through chick flicks/romantic comedies (romcoms) from time to time.  This isn't really a romcom though.  Sure there are easily predictable romcom elements to it.  The main character is unlucky in love, she stumbles across a fairly likable bloke, she likes him, he likes her and then she does something to push him away but of course they get back together at the end and we live happily ever after.  Dull, predictable and boring.

The chicks.

Movie Predictions: The Adventures of Tin Tin: Secret of the Unicorn

Disclaimer: This prediction is purely based on watching the trailer for the movie and without any knowledge of what this movie is about. We apologise for our ignorance in advance but hey, it's us.

     So, where to begin?

     Snowy!

     Fucking Snowy!

Fucking Snowy!

     I got a little bit of goosebumps watching that trailer..

     I think overall it looks great.

     Agreed.

New Release Movies: Scott Pilgrim vs the World (2010)

Scott Pilgrim vs the World is a flick from a great director in Edgar Wright, based on the comics of the same name. It's definitely a departure from his last films, which are predominantly hilarious English affairs involving Simon Pegg and Nick Frost. Following up from the excellent Hot Fuzz would be no mean feat, but thankfully he delivered with quite simply a brilliant, quirky and downright cool movie.

New Release Movies: Toy Story 3 (2010)

We start of with a fantastic opening scene involving a train heist, bridge explosion, force field dogs, force field eating dinosaur and a giant pig space ship.  The toys are back and better than ever.  We skip to a montage of Andy and his family growing older and by the end of it Andy is 17 years old and off to college.  The toys are screaming out to be played with as it appears they haven't been played with for a long time.